Grace and Favours

When I was  initially diagnosed with secondary breast cancer back in April, the thought had crossed my mind whilst waiting for test results , that my time on this precious earth was on count down and decided back then to celebrate my ‘big’ birthdays in five 5 year increments, instead of the traditional 10, and so began my plans for a 45th birthday party by way of cramming in as many special moments that I  could with my friends and family.

My mum never  quite make it to her 45th birthday and so 45 was always going to be a significant personal milestone for me in any event,  and so the occasion of this particular  birthday was well and truly marked on 2nd December by a most wonderful gathering of some of my most favourite people.

By the time of my party, my understanding and the status of my illness had evolved and so not only was I celebrating my birthday,  I was doing so having had the best of  CT scan results on the 17th November, showing  ‘no evidence of disease’ (NED) in my body’.

Since then, there has certainly been a reduced sense of pressure to ‘live life and squuuuueeeeeze lot’s in while I can’. With a secondary diagnosis creating the uncertainly that it does, I remain a little suspicious of the whole ‘NED’ thing, however the results has put a pause on the ‘count down’ in my mind and has opened up a future that for a time, I felt was going to soon evade me.  

My Son and DIL were of course my guests of honour at my partyand I managed to hold it together enough  during my speech to congratulate them on the birth of their very own ‘golden child’, who was born on 30th October 2017, and thank them for blessing my life with Jonah, my first grandchild.

I have been an emotional wreck over the timing of my re diagnosis because it  coincided with the joy of the pregnancy news, thankfully this is settling with a focus that only Jonah has been able to give me and I am so looking forward to watching him grow and being the best Nanny I can be.

My family tree being what it is, it is such a rare thing to have my brothers at the same celebrations and so to have John, Nick, Mark, Julian and their families at my party was very special. There was just Jonathan that couldn’t make it but he sent his love and  of course, Chris and Andrew’s presence was felt through their amazing daughters Jade ,Jana and Melanie who were there with their loved ones.

Meeting my Great Nephew Caleb for the first time

As for all my friends, it felt like a collision of all of my worlds coming together with both new and old friendships . Life, time, and distance often means that we lose touch , but that night   our special bonds allowed us to pick up as it was yesterday and I feeI totally blessed to have them all in my life. My oldest friend, Viv and my very own source of inspiration was among the guests and took pride of place for the party selfie I took from the stage. 

I had chemo 10 day’s before my party, which I knew meant that I would be just about picking up from the worst of the side effects,  however not quite enough to prevent my 'knickers getting in a twist' over fatigue and the last minute party preparations, so I was relieved when Jules and Bernie, friends that came into my world only a few short months ago , stepped in, out of nowhere really, and declared that I should leave the final preps to them and insisted I rest so I may enjoy my party!  It was purely thanks to them and the their assistants, John ,Tracey and Lauren that I had such a relaxing day and so I was well rested for the party shenanigan’s.   

The function room at the Midland Band WMC ,  was adorned and totally transformed into a ‘twinkling’ party room by the most wonderful decorations, accessories and skills provided by Jules and her wedding and party decorations business  ‘Grace and Favours’…..

I just loved the twinkly corner ‘grotto’ with it’s post box, sweet shop and photo frame area. I had asked party revellers to bring photo’s of our favourite friendship/family moments instead of cards to display and I thoroughly enjoyed reminiscing over the memories. Walking in and seeing it all for the first time was truly a memorable moment. Staff at the WMC even commented how they had never seen the room look so pretty, but it was  the  sheer acts of kindness and generosity  at the core of it all that was the most beautiful aspect of it all.

I must add that the red and gold 80’s inspired Christmas garland hanging from the ceiling had nothing to do with Julie ! I cant believe they actually still make them ! Lol!

As if couldn’t get any luckier that night; I had TWO surprise birthday cakes thanks to Tracey and Gill. Tracey’s first attempt at decorating a cake was a complete winner and Gill’s chocolate Haribo cake played right into my guilty pleasures . Trevors’  delicious rum punch added a favourite touch to the evening … and was worth the  reprimand  from the bar manager for sharing it with my guests!

With Chris as DJ, There were truly some hilarious moments on the dance floor, that I shall ‘emotionally dine’ on for a long time , including Danny leading the conga, dancing ‘ganman style’ with my brothers and nephew’s and taking in everyones happy ‘Hockey Cokey’ faces ! May be the hockey Cokey is what it’s all about!

Thanks to chief photographer Jackie , the essence of the evening was captured in this precious precious video/photo montage.... your best work yet!! 

Greeting everyone was particularly emotional, my face literally hurt from smiling. The hug’s were overwhelming , though with each one of them came a tug of my wig and a pull from the back creating an increasingly high forehead requiring some regular wig adjustments. I’m sure this would have gone unnoticed,  had I not found it comical and told everyone about my wig malfunction! 

My only regret was that  there was  just not enough time to spend with people individually , however everything that I set out to achieve from this party has been realised, bonds have been reenergised, new connections established and plans for 2018 have been made!

I’m feeling well and truly revived by the celebrations after the monotony of recent months.  I can’t thank everyone enough for understanding the significance of it all and making it so special, and truly hope to see you all for my 50th when God willing we will get  to do it all over again!  

Thank you for all the cards, gifts and photo’s