The Deed is done!

Well.... the deed is well and truly done and Im going for the baby George look!

So…the hair was 'buzzed' off by Debby the hair lady, and the 'event' was marked by quality time spent with Danny and a cheeky stop at 'Dreams coffee shop' for tea and cake afterwards. This of course was also 'Vivian's' first outing and Im glad to say she behaved impeccably!

I have had a 'mop of hair' for most of my life, and I can't say that having my hair buzzed off was one of the best experiences of my life. In hindsight, this is probably something that could have been done at home, however somehow, turning this into a positive 'memory making' opportunity with quality time spent with Danny and Becky helped.

Danny and Becky also stayed for Pizza and a natter that evening and being surrounded by Steve and the DD's was priceless. The day won't be remembered for the day my hair was buzzed off but for having lovely family time, just as my first round of chemo will not be know as the time I felt 'shitty', but a time when I raised nearly £500 for NGH ! See what I'm doing there?...

Taking back some control and sugar coating the 'crap' works for me. This being said, cancer has created a 'fragility' that I don't recognise in myself, and I'm not totally unaffected by the fact that I'm now bald and have wonky boobs and scars.

I'm usually pretty strong on an emotional level and to be honest, whilst it probably won't be obvious to others, there have been a couple of short lived emotional wobbles this last week or so. I am aware, however, that the tragic death of Tracy (age 44), an old friend, has had a large part to play in that.

Steve continues to be a 'rock 'on a practical level and he is 'always there', however he can struggle with the emotional support. This is not unusual of Steve, and probably common with most men (after all 'men are from mars...'), however what is unusual is that my ability to deal with this quickly has reduced, so it's been a little tough on that front.

I've been open about showing my 'bald' head to family and friends, and I have been met with some encouraging comments!! I'm under no illusion that they are probably just being polite...but I'll take the compliments regardless!… Steve's initial response was that I looked like Sinead O'Connor, other than that he tends to avoid commenting on it, which I find very difficult. What he has been able to say is that, this for him, is confirmation that I'm really ill, and so I can understand how he feels.

So… With 'Round One' having done 'it's worst', I say I probably got off lightly! I leave 'Round One' a winner, albeit bruised and with an overwhelming sense of achievement from the lessons I have learnt and the fundraising I have done. What is left now to do, is to embrace what ever 'Round Two' has to offer me and carry on 'filling the cracks with gold' and kicking cancer's ass!